So What If I'm A Mom Now

My results the last few years have been far below what I am capable of. In 2013 I raced half of a season just months after having a c-section, with very little training and almost no running. The fact that I finished those races was a victory. In 2014 I was able to run again, but struggled to find my form all year. I had some decent results, but my training was geared toward building a base and getting strong again, and not necessarily racing fast.  

The reaction from most people was: you're a mom now. Things are different. In other words:  just accept that you are slower now. You don't have the time to train as much as your competition. 

They're right. Things are different for me. I very efficiently squeeze all of my training in between 9-5 each weekday and train 1 hour a day on the weekends. Instead of sitting around in NormaTec boots to recover, I sit on the floor and play dolls. Sometimes my post-workout meals consist of a few pouches of baby food chicken and rice. On my mornings off, I go with Amy to Budding Ballerina class or to Aqua Tots swim lessons.  

At night, I go to bed wondering if Amy is eating enough or debating whether I should have read to her instead of letting her watch my phone while I made dinner. 

But is all of this a detriment to my racing career? I think not. Here's why.

I stopped by the library today on my way to the pool to check in on Amy's storytime class. I was checking out all the strollers to see if she and Mamzie had arrived when I met the librarian. She said, "oh you're Amy's mom? We aren't supposed to say this, but Amy is my absolute favorite. She's just so bright…so so bright. We love having her." And then she flagged over the other librarian and the maintenance man and they continued to go on about my little Amy.

According to SJ, they say that to all the parents. Maybe they do, but it's the first time anyone has said something like that to me. It made me feel, for a second, that maybe I am doing something right as a mom.

I then headed over to the pool with a fierce I-can-do-anything attitude. I jumped in the water and swam as fast as I ever have. Halfway through practice my lanemates stopped and asked, "What got into you? How are you able to unleash a workout like that?" I just shrugged my shoulders and said, sometimes being a mom has it's advantages.